Do You Have 8 Minutes?

Be honest.

When you are in crisis, going through a bad relationship, a broken heart, or feeling doubt about a decision, are you a dumper? Do you immediately call that one friend, or multiple friends, until you feel comfortable with the decision you already want to make?Are you constantly unsure and need someone to reaffirm whether you were right or wrong?

How many friends do you call, one, two, or ten?

Do you over share?

Dumping on a friend means unloading a lot of negative emotions, stress, or problems onto them, often without checking whether they have the emotional capacity to listen or support you in that moment.

It is not intentional harm.
It is desperation without boundaries.

I will admit it, and my friends would confirm it.

While I am a strong and courageous woman, I used to dump on my friends when I felt uncertain. When dealing with a broken heart or a breakup in the past, I would show up with the entire dump truck.

I was that girl.

Until I heard a segment on YouTube by Simon Sinek about The Power of 8 Minutes.

He shared that research shows when someone is struggling, they often only need eight minutes to reconnect back to themselves.

Eight minutes to breathe.
Eight minutes to be heard.
Eight minutes to feel grounded again.

It does not feel good when your friends stop answering your calls. It does not feel good when they start offering tough love or quietly disconnect.

And it also does not help when friends do not communicate their emotional capacity or boundaries.

Most of the time, no one is trying to hurt anyone.
We are just all carrying more than we say out loud.

Because I am committed to living a courageous life, and making sure I have the tools to do so, I realized something important.

I need my friends.
But I also need to respect them.

Now, when something feels urgent, I do something simple.

I text first and ask,

“Hey, do you have 8 minutes?”

That one sentence creates space.
It honors time.
It respects emotional capacity.

Eight minutes is more than five.
But it is not everything.
And often, it is enough.

A Simple Girl does not avoid hard moments.
She meets them with honesty, self awareness, and respect.

She chooses connection with intention.
She honors her emotions without placing them on others.

She asks before she enters sacred space.
She respects boundaries, hers and theirs.

She knows that strength is not found in over explaining or over sharing.
It is found in clarity, courage, and care.

So if your friends and family help you get through hard seasons, try this.

Ask before you unload.
Do not assume availability.
Do not get upset if the answer is no.

Because simple is not careless.
Simple is courageous.
Simple is aligned.

Sometimes, all we need is eight minutes to remember who we are again. It’s just that Simple!